My Dark Unicorn

No woman is a unicorn! A lesson I have learned the hard way. Do not I repeat DO NOT fall into the trap of thinking she’s not like other women! When in love its easy to think she’s a special little gem. And soon u treat her that way. What´s wroong with that ? u may ask.. Well if you want to be chewed alive and spit out, if you want your woman to start despising you, to cheat on you. Then nothing! But if you want a healthy relationship, a loyal wife and happiness, then get this right from the start.. don`t repeat my mistakes! There are no unicorns! End of story. And against all odds if there where, it still would be safer to treat here like she was not so there are no exceptions! J Your game needs to be on! All time, every day. No rest for men we need to perform. We need to be strong.

This blog is about my life, how it went down the toilet and how I started a new. So let`s start from the beginning! Not all the way, don`t want to bore u if anyone actually reads this. But it wont matter because this blogs by me for me! it`s my personal journal but you may take a peak if you choose.

I met my wife let`s call her L. when I was in my early twenties, she was and still is two years older. J She worked in the restaurant as a chef where I started as a waiter. She told me later the moment she saw me her hearth stopped and she fell in love. She knew she had to have that man ( boy ). We where both at the time in a relationship we where not happy in. Soon after I started at the restaurant we went out to party with the other workers. We started dancing and kissing and shared a taxi home( we lived in the same direction ). Things got heated in the cab and we would have ended in bed but both had somebody home waiting for us so I kissed her good night and exited the cab.

Next day at work we agreed that “nothing” happened and we should keep it that way. She was fun to work with and I flirted with her on a daily basis. I flirted with the customers also and even if she tried to not show it got to her a little. Sometimes she would ask what I tought about some girls sitting at a table and I would go and check them out. If they where cute I flirted with them and many times ended up with a number or two. I did not do anything with the numbers it was just a game for me. One time two regular girls that came about once a week and with who I flirted told my they would do a amature porn movie, they wanted me to come and do a threesome with them, they told they had a scene in mind where I would fuck them in a car. One of the girls was nice and fuckable but the other not so I declined with a laugh. I had standards to keep! Work in a restaurant can really be fun for a young man. The opportunities are many J I was ok looking in good shape and even if a had no formal game I was no chump! Later I have many times wondered what the fuck happened to me? Where did it go wrong, when and why did I start to slip. No matter how hard I try, I can`t put my finger on it. I only know what I become and where I ended but nothing in between.

After a while working in the same restaurant with L. We had a party at a co workers summer cabbine. I have newer seen or experienced a woman work so hard to get a man in bed sa she did to get me.She later told me she had decided to fuck me that night no matter what and that she almost lost hope ( I played hard to get) . She did every come on in the book and I just shrugged her off with a smile or asshole comment. That just made her try even harder. Well as you can guess that night we ended keeping everybody else awake with some long and loud noise. The following months where to put it mildly interesting. We where both in a relationship and living together so we fucked at work. We fucked before work, during work (don’t ask how is`possible ) and after work! Even to day I can not eat at a restaurant without imagining what has happened on my table or in the kitchen after closing hour. Even the managers keyboard in the office got it`s sample of bodily fluids.

The takeaway from this is: If a woman sees you as Alpha  she WILL find a way to fuck you! No matter what! And she will fuck you with devotion and urgency! All consequences set a side.

So far so good you may say. Yeas so far things are going good for me, im on top of my shit.

As I learned to know L. better there where warning signs. I can see them now because I have not only retrospective but also knowledge. It’s of utmost importance to spread the knowledge of game to young men. It could have saved me and also my family of so much pain if I only had a fraction of what I know now. She had a problematic childhood her mother was no real mother and L. had to take care of her younger sister at a very early age. Her mother has never to this day told her “ I love you”. L´s father left when she was 4 years old and they made contact again when she was twenty. When I met her she had two young children with an abusive man who she told me she only used to get away from her mother. And she wanted children so he was needed, she confessed she betrayed him every time she had a oportunity probably with 10 other men at least.

Now writing this I’m totally blown away by how I was blue eyed and naïve. But at this point the Love thing had clouded my vision. And she was hot, the sex was plenty and exiting. I enjoyed our time together. I had never been in love and it was a great feeling, and she totally worshipped me. Not long after we stared our fling we both left our respective other`s. I was not yet the pussy I would become and maintained my frame and told her that I considered myself still single, even if a was not seeing others. I wanted to keep my options alive.

We had a couple of great years, got our first son together in 2003 and life was nice. I had big ambitions and was involved in a startup company that went flying in the beginning but crashed and burned in the end. This could be a blog of it`s own right because so much happened, one partner got mentally ill and committed murder and the other used company money to renovate his apartment and travel abroad. And when things went sour I was the only one standing to put out the lights. But that`s another story. After the start-up I was unemployed a while and we had financial problems. I think this is the time things start to change. The unemployment got to me and I gained a few pounds and was a bit down. At this time I noticed that L. had no sympathy or empathy for me, she just could not handle my weakness. Later I noticed the same when I was ill had the flu or something, she got pissed at me being sick. Some years later I confronted her and asked why it was so terrible if I was sick and feeling down. She could not tell but admitted that she had a hard time handling me weak. Oh and how weak I would be.. ‘I broke out of the financial troubles and went into sales, I started my selling career strong and things started to look better again. But our relationship with L. was never the same. The frame had changed, and even if the changes where small at first and gradual, in time it was clear she was the head of the household and we even joked about it. Everything was done after her plan and how she wanted it to be done. I was happy to do things her way as I believed it made her happy. This had become my mission to make her happy. After all crap she gone trough I wanted to save her, to make her feel good about herself to make her life great.

At the time I had not come to the understanding of what I refer to as “the ultimate truth of happiness”

“Every man is responsible for his own happiness!”

It`s so simple, you just cant make another human happy, if they don`t want to be. Your impact on others happiness is very small, marginal at best. But at the time I took on myself to make her whole, mend her soul and make her happy.

This quest destroyed everything and made her despise me, yes women despice weak men who try to meet their every demand. The demands always get bigger or change and when you met them it still don`t matter. Your just a pice of lowlife beta sucker. I slowly got hooked on the drug L. I got addicted to serving my queen.  Do not get me wrong we had many good times and we had 4 kids together so things went ok,  we where happy for the most time. When we were together the two of us or as a family we had fun and we argued very little, but the seed for the crashes was sown. My life mission had become to make her life good but you just cant give up your self and expect somebody to respect you. And what happens when a woman loses respect for her man? What happens when a man loses respect for himself? Nothing good! That is for sure.

At this time I had become used to the fact that we had sex maybe ones a month, many times two months could go by. I sometimes got sad and confronted her that I needed her ; I needed closeness, physical tough and sexual intimacy. I was in one word needy I needed her so much! She explained that every relationship changes it`s not like in the beginning. And she just isin`t the sexual person she was anymore.

Now I know that`s just Bull! Women are sexual beings, if your LTR or wife don`fuck you anymore it`s not because she don`t want to fuck. She don’t`want to fuck YOU! It`s becouse you don`t give her the tingels anymore. She has not lost interest in sex she has lost intrest in sex with you! That`s a bitter fruit to swallow but denying wont help. You got to stop “bitching” about no sex in your LTR. Stop joking with your friends how you have no sex now that you been married for so long! You got to face the facts and do something! You got to man up!

The takeaway:

“Every man is responsible for his own happiness!”


Next: The Crash! Or why I hate yoga!

Fridge clean test

Or How you turn a nagging wife to sweet loving and willing in 2 mins.



I’m att the summer cottage with my boys and L. ( my wife ) is home cleaning. I cleaned the fridge a week ago and she finds fault in my handy work and start nagging about it. I recognise it for what it is a shit test.

Below I first show how this would have turned out last year and then how it wen`t now after my awakening. You may ask how I know It would have gone like that? I have known L. for some 6000 days and encountered these kinds of situations almost daily so my experience is counted not in hundreds but in thousands of similar situations. So im quite sure it would have gone down just as I imagined.

  1. The old TJ.

L. :                       A dumb question because you should answer “yes”, but did you clean the outside of the fridge and the lists in between?

TJ. :                     Oh, umh, I started to but then something came I think my mother called and I talked to her and maybe forgot… Sorry! Sorry! I can clean them better When I get back.

L. :                       Ok, then I understand, was wondering how I got the fridge so dirty when I have opened it like only ones a day.

L. :                       I’m going to wash your underwear from now on only from the outside… When you do something you have to do it properly. You can’t just leave it half done. How would your customers at work react if you did just half of what you promise? I get so mad, I do all the work at home and when I ask you to do one thing! One thing! Can you get it done? NO! I don´t know how I can trust you with anything when I can`t trust you with one simple thing like cleaning the fridge! And have you remembered to take the car to be serviced NO! And last year when I told you to clean the windows have you done that? NO! It`s only one year ago.. how long do you think I have to wait before you get things done.. ( and so on.. )

TJ. :                     Sorry, Sorry I will try to do better, to be better. I’m sorry ! I love you! You know that I don`t want to do anything to make you unhappy! I try my best but I only make you unhappy Im so sorry for being such a bad husband.

L. :Are you kidding me??? You spent to evenings cleaning the fridge and you didn´t even clean the whole thing… Cheese!!!

End of conversation.

If at home I would have tried to kiss god night and hold her in bed but she would have brushed me away and turned her back at me like 360 nights a year.

Not nice, I was unhappy, she was mad and unhappy and our relationship did not move in a better direction. So what is the solution. How do you turn this nagging in to loving and willing? Clean the fridge better? No, sorry I tried that solution and it just don`t work there will be something else.. Let`S se how this played out in reality:

2. The New TJ.

L. :                       A dumb question because you should answer “yes”, but did you clean the outside of the fridge and the lists in between?

TJ. :                     no

L. :                       Ok, then I understand, was wondering how I got the fridge so dirty when I have opened it like only ones a day.

L. :                       I’m going to wash your underwear from no on only from the outside…

TJ. :                     Ok, I’ll use them from no on, inside out

L. :                       Are you kidding me??? You spent two evenings cleaning the fridge and you didn´t even clean the whole thing… Cheese!!!

TJ. :                     No thanks, no cheese you know my stomach can´t handle diary

Then she cracks and answers “you asshole ” and a lot`s of smiles and hearts! And we continue a small flirty conversation.

I’m quite sure that if I would have been home she would have been on her knees for me.

So a little (or big ) change in your attitude and maintaining frame and no supplication or excuses and no im sorry! I repeat NO APPOLOGIES! And the outcome was better not just for me, but both of us. She was happy !

Our women want us to pass their tests, they want a man who is worth their affection. We as men are not supposed to be moved by our women. They expect us to stand our ground and if you fail it`s not the badly cleaned fridge that she is upset at. It`s the sheep of a husband that she is disappointed in. This took me to long to figure out so you be wiser and do it right from the go.